132 – Seeking Approval?

Positive and negative reinforcement, good and bad consequences, good and bad rewards and punishments.

We are all motivated by different things.  Some people run away from bad, and some run towards the good.

As a health professional and coach it’s important for me to understand what motivates a client’s behavior.  And to help them transition from their current state of pain (whether it’s physical pain or the pain of their current situation), I need for them to see the risks and benefits and to promote one to help them leap towards (or away) their goal (or from punishment).

And for each and everyone of us.  You have to ask yourself, “why am I doing this?  why do I care about XYZ?”

And if you can answer that, you can see if you’re in the trap of wanting approval from someone else, or avoiding the punishment from another, or really just living the life that YOU want.

Unfortunately, with social media, we are encouraged over and over again to seek approval in the form of “likes” or Reddit points, or shares/retweets and the like.   These are really powerful dopamine inducing pleasure responses to know that other people are approving of our posts and thoughts and opinions.  We get addicted to it.  And it’s hard to even break free from it in our “real lives” by not trying to seek that same reward.

So the next time you’re doing chores, helping around the house, dressing your kids, dressing yourself…  why?   Is your hair perfect for you?  Or for some fake ass people to approve you?